Morning Folks!!
THIS APPEARED ON CRAIGSLIST and is guaranteed to give you a
laugh in good fun...
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of “beating around the bush”. I'm a
beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and
classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy
who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in
mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any
wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average
around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an
investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is
she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics-
bars, restaurants, gyms
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you
won't hurt my feelings
-Is there an age range I should be targeting like in 40s or
what (I'm 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the
upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer,
investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do
they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am
looking for MARRIAGE ONLY
Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in
an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up
front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able
to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and
hearth.
AN ANSWER THAT WAS POSTED
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought
meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your
predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who
fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain
and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S.,
what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I
bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my
income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any
more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am
an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates!
Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5
years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a
fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading
position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good
business sense to 'buy you' (which is what you're asking) so I'd
rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If
my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an
out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not
marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient
markets.
So, I wonder why a girl as 'articulate, classy and
spectacularly beautiful' as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy.
I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that
the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own
money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you're going about it the
right way.
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some
sort of lease, let me know.
*********
Talk about a LAUGH OUT
LOUD.
Does that just make you laugh or what?
I love how the poster commented that the woman 'could
always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this
difficult conversation'.
If you're a woman...I
don't have to tell you that women are JUST AS GOOD AS MEN (if not better) in
just about any business.
There's any number of
ultra-successful women reading this blog (more and more coming as the old boys
club gets prettied up a little) and they could back me up on that even if we’ve
never met or said hello. Women like that one, though, jeez...I thank my
lucky stars I have an accomplished, beautiful girlfriend who has a LIFE OF HER
OWN...and would stand by my side even if I lost every dime I've ever earned.
Thank God I bought her FirstNameLastName.com so she can never escape
me, muahahaha!
If you're a fella, I hope you've got one of those ladies in
your life, too. I hope anyone reading that got a good chuckle...and in case you
wonder if I simply wanted to make you laugh today, maybe you want to read that
again.
Only imagine the title is:
[[Small Business
Looking for a Good Internet Marketing Plan (PROVEN to Increase Sales)]]
Shall I spell it out in another way without “beating around
the bush”?
Here you go:
Okay, I'm tired of “beating around
the bush”. I'm a small but established business (increasingly successful), 25
years old with a brick and mortar store. I'm good at what I do and
customer-oriented.
I'm not from the World Wide Web.
I'm looking to get on the internet and grow my business at least half a million
a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is small
news on the World Wide Web, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any business advisors who
can help me make 500K or more on this board? Any websites you can show me? Could
you send me some tips?
Sure.
Don’t skip over this
ONE decision bringing your brick and mortar business online or you’ll end up
regretting it.
Don’t spend $8.99 for a one night stand we can tell you how
it’ll end.
Do your due diligence and you’ll realize $1000 per month is
a bargain for operating a million dollar asset, increasing profits with it, and
down the road having a chance to buy it without coming out of pocket more up
front capital than you can afford to easily part with today.
PROVEN INTERNET
INVESTMENT WORTH MARRYING TO YOUR COMPANY
PRODUCT.com or
SERVICE.com or
SOCIAL.com or
###.com or
Hotels.com or
ABCD.com
SPECULATIVE
INTERNET GAMBLE ANY SMART BUSINESS OWNER WOULDN’T SLEEP WITH FOR ONE .NIGHT
PRODUCT.crap
SERVICE.biz or
SOCIAL.tv or
###.fm or
BLAHBLAH.hotels
ABCD.net
Simple. Straight forward.
You can be beautiful AND rich. Just marry right.
(yes sweetie, I said
it but don’t think that was an informal proposal
so much as a funny inside joke that’ll be written here in ink online forever)
Danny Welsh
JointVentures.com
KA
Really old internet meme, but still a classic.
Anunt
I’m not saying she’s fat, she’s just easy to see!!!
Rich
I’ve enjoyed it.
See Rick…now you can add a page to your JointVenture”LeaseDate”LOL
Joe
To put it in her terms, why should wealthy men”buy and hold” her for the long term when they could”lease” her as she will depreciate in value over time?
eh
Nice find. Another Gem.
Reminds me of: why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free.
For domainers, it should be, why sell the cow, when you can sell the milk.
Jeff Schneider
Hi Danny,
Great lead in Headline to lasso in the ego side of everyone. There are others with Beautiful minds that can explain The Laws of Governing Dynamics that are the real catch. How did you get so lucky?
Gratefully, Jeff Schneider (Contact Group) (Metal Tiger)
Mark Talbot
Danny, why is it then that people only know it is over when”the fat lady sings”?
The pretty’s sing first, second, and third.
But the big gal knows how to capture and bring down the house.
Everybody knows it, and every man waits for it. She knows how to please.
And she aint”available” to buy. ;)
George
sounds good
but you haven’t answered why you or Rick aren’t out there buying 70 x 100k .com’s?
dont you believe what you’re selling?
Ms Domainer
*
I love the answer posted–a very wise man, indeed, thinking with his brain and not his…uh, nether regions.
She has presented herself as an object to be bought, and we all know what THAT makes her. She received exactly the answer she deserved.
Anyone stupid enough to fall for this ad would be well-advised to watch both his wallet and his life.
:)
*
UFO
Too true on the looks side, but looks like money can be lost relatively quickly. Sounds like the woman should move to a small town and then she could be a big fish in a small pond.
More people should play what I call ‘The prejudice game’ where you wear old clothes and go about your business and see how people react, jumped up little bank clerks and people who work in clothing stores seem to be the most prejudicial. Then try going in the same places wearing a suit…
My neighbour thinks I’m the gardener for my house (and referred to me as such).. The only time I’m ever seen is when I have to do gardening and wear my scruffiest clothing I have. Ha ha… Financial charades, its fun.
Rick Schwartz
George,
You keep posting the same TRASH on different blog posts.
1. You are an idiot
2. There is a time to reap and a time to sew.
3. You are an idiot.
george
sorry you feel that way Rick,
i was a big supporter
but now it sounds like you are asking people to buy what you wont buy
Danny Welsh
RE:”Reminds me of: why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free. For domainers, it should be, why sell the cow, when you can sell the milk.”
No doubt! I’d even take it a step further in your analogy, if I may? How about this:
“For domainers, it should be, why sell the cow, when you can sell the rights to milk the herd.”
Not bad, eh? :)
Danny Welsh
JointVentures.com
Danny Welsh
RE:”How did you get so lucky?”
Ahh, my man…about that.
Luck vs Skill. Destiny vs Design. God’s plan vs Man’s Efforts.
Which is real and which is all imaginary in our head?
Sometimes I frankly never know.
*shrugs shoulders*
Would it totally be prideful of me to say SHE got lucky too? :)
All I know is that she *does* make me happy!
Danny Welsh
JointVentures.com
Danny Welsh
Ms. Domainer, LOL good one.
Mark Talbot, I’m not sure I follow what you said. Was it meant to imply that I like or don’t like fat women? Where did that come from? Was it meant to be funny? Is there a metaphor I missed?
George, here’s my final answer to you: http://www.ricksblog.com/my_weblog/2013/01/mans-best-friend-is-a-great-domain-name.html#comment-6a00d83451f3f569e2017ee801f04a970d
Take it or leave it. Do business with us via JointVentures.com or not. Your choice! I’m sure Rick Schwartz could say the same thing in different words: read his blog or not. Your choice! But if you want to get ANY response from either of us in the future…
IDENTIFY YOURSELF
Danny Welsh
JointVentures.com
Mark Talbot
Lol, Danny, no I wasnt trying to be facetious in any way. It was a metaphor indeed, yes. My fault for being a bit obscure.
Pretty ladies,.. cheap and available for a price. The fat lady,… she sings but only until one waits..”one should not presume to know the outcome of an event which is still in progress”.
It was a positive analogy in regards to top quality domains.
Nothing else intended.
Mark Talbot
Added to append my last post…
It was a positive analogy in regards to top quality domains,”and Joint Ventures.com”.
You guys get too serious sometimes, sit back, pour yourself a nice libation of your choice, and enjoy it.
Life is too short.
Danny Welsh
Haha, my girlfriend used to work at the company that makes Jack Daniel’s while she was getting her MBA. Not bad, that they paid for it. One of those huge companies where 90% of the people don’t work in a department that drives revenue. I look at those companies and shake my head. Sure they’re successful but…why have a dozen products that all lose money each year? Why have 2 or 3 that bring in 80% of your revenue? Why not expand what works internationally and chuck what didn’t sell in the U.S. or vice versa? Why need 7 levels of managers to make a decision so your sales people can react to market conditions and sell better?
Anyway, not to rant but big companies are run mostly by people who I wouldn’t hire. And that’s at the mid-level anyway. There are always underappreciated diamonds in the rough making nothing for a big company that can SHINE in a small one but I digress.
Anyway, I get your point and thanks for clarifying man! If I hadn’t drunk all the Jack Daniel’s she had from her career there I’d take your advice. All we have left are 60 bottles of Herradura Tequila and margaritas are not really my thing. Maybe we can trade for some good stuff if and when Rick and I do a deal for IrishWhiskey.com in the next year or two. I’ll have to check with Howard Neu and see if he’s okay with that. I can’t see why not, with the company being called”JointVentures.com” an all. That makes me wonder what my partner Rick Schwartz/s favorite drink is. Or if he even drinks at all. :)
Pour me another anytime, Mark.
CHEERS!
Danny Welsh
JointVentures.com